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I started writing this in the notes but it’s big so it’s going here. Like, I’m really all for semantics in arguments or language where it is important or serves a purpose, but seriously, relationship status does not necessarily equal personal identity, and I don’t see why it needs to or why those things can’t be described as what they are rather than needing to be tied together? Like I think there is a lot of value in separating out those concepts because being bi and in a ‘straight’ relationship is a seriously different experience to being bi and in a ‘gay’/’queer’ relationship, and at the same time who you are dating still does not change your sexuality so why does your identity need to be subsumed into the gender label of your relationship?
Like, my relationships do not have to mirror or explain or embody my whole sexual identity all the time, I am still me no matter who or how I’m dating. My relationship can be straight or queer or whatever else and that doesn’t alter or discount my bisexuality/queerness, and to me if anything trying to conflate identity and relationship status seems more in line with stereotypes of bisexual people as confused swingers than just calling a relationship arrangement by its usual label!
I really just don’t see the point in summating the two into the same label, like where does this level of semantics even lead to? And like what happens if one person is straight and the other is bi, what is my relationship then, does it still NEED to be called bisexual to affirm one person’s bisexuality? And really if my (bi)sexuality and my relationship status have to be the same then does that mean my sexual identity is inextricably tied to my relationships rather than my feelings of self? Where does that lead? And where does that leave us when we try to talk amongst ourselves about the differences in experience between being in ‘straight’ relationships versus being in queer ones? Like I just what even with this whole train of thought.
I love that point in a friendship when you get what the other person’s style is - their “thing.” You see a knit jersey tie and think of them immediately; a type of weather, a bad movie, a woman’s outfit. You know, with absolute certainty, that your friend would enjoy this thing with you more than anyone else in the world. You feel closer in that moment of recognition, even if they’re not there.
being called annoying is literally the worst thing ever because then you’re scared to ever say or do anything again and you end up isolating yourself because you think everyone hates you and you feel insecure about everything. long story short pls dont call people annoying
yelling at someone when they’re crying? funnily enough, that’s probably not going to make them stop. neither is insulting them. especially if the insult has to do with the fact that they’re crying. those are the things that are probably going to make them want to cry more. and feel worse. wow! that’s fun